really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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