how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
