Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
