we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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