She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Sext me about skeletons
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize