i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
