its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Randomize
