I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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