I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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