Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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