Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
