they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
