dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Randomize
