i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
