I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
