Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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