Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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