I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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