If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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