Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Randomize