He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Randomize
