I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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