FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
