im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
