I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
