bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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