oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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