sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
birth control should be required to get into college
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
