It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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