Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
