Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
