im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize