Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
