i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
