??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I can't put those talents on a resume
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
