i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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