What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
