Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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