u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Randomize
