Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
