So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Randomize
