capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Found the puke drawer
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Randomize
