Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
