Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Randomize
