the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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