Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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