It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize