i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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