theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
