sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
