honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
